Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Will I Ever?

I hate to say it but I had a visitor planned today that I really wasn't looking forward to. She is a very dear friend but with her five kids and me already feeling a little unsettled and protective with Bones in my space which I have found difficult this time, maybe just from being sick, and I was feeling guilty about only being able to focus on the difficulties of such a visit.

But it was a really lovely visit. We had a wonderful catch up, the children were relatively good and there really wasn't all that much cleaning up afterwards. The impossible princess often has difficulties with the visiting girl of her age but they played wonderfully, and the older kids generally just hung out and entertained themselves. I also got lots of cuddles from the 15 week old baby and successfully get him to sleep - I've still got it, folks!

Afterwards, however, my anticipated motivation had completely dissipated and I watched Australia on DVD again. I did do a big roast dinner, which was very yummo, got a load of washing hung out and brought in and the house is relatively tidy, although there are an increasing number of piles of miscellaneous bits and pieces beginning to take on lurker status in some of the out of the way places around the house.

Last night I woke up at 4am in the exact same position that I had fallen asleep in so obviously sleeping like a log. Very weird story dreams. Lots of problem solving and practical things to be worked through while I'm asleep apparently. I remember a situation of embarrassment while trying to stay in control and manage stuff but there were people who knew about it and were supporting me and I brushed off the embarrassing stuff as it was out of my control anyway. Something about aliens or some kind of invaders. I don't really remember much else but I think it was more draining than restful.

So, here I am again when I should be in bed despite my most earnest promises to myself of getting to bed early each night. When will I ever learn?

Monday, July 20, 2009

A Few Certain Things

Are there things in your life that you continually treat as a hurdle despite all rational thought confirming that there is no logical reason for you to be treating it that way?

There are a few things that I have on my To Do list that I appear to be over complicating. Getting to the stage of acknowledging that has to be a good thing, right?

Now, how to get on to the stage of actually taking action?

When do explanations such as work, kids, family, housework etc become nothing more than excuses?

How do you work out what is causing the mental block so you can overcome it?

Does it get to the point where you have to stop thinking and analysing and just do it?

Why does knowing the answers to all these questions not help at all in getting a few certain things done?

Mercy

I've got a headache and a YAAD assignment to do that I haven't even started. Oh, teach, have mercy on my soul!