The Only Way

Sliding backwards
or downwards
is often
as subtle a process
as the slow ascent
back up from where you were.

This is me at the moment.

I'm still scared
to look back over my shoulder
and to see that place
where I have been
for longer than I could
really acknowledge.

The presence of that place
seems to nip at my heels
and just as a simple carelessness
like an untied shoelace
can serve to trip me up as I move forward
it can also provide
something for that place at my heels
to grab onto
to sink its teeth into
until it can get a good bight of my flesh
and re-start the process of my dismemberment.

And it may only take
a snag of a stray shoelace
or perhaps only even
a moment of hesitancy
as I glance back over my shoulder
and that monster of a place
may once again become my best friend.

So, I'm doing my best
not to go there
and am taking things
day by day
and taking down the wall
brick by brick
and moving along my path
step by step.

Because that really is the only way.