Friday, October 8, 2010

Will Too

By the end of the day
I am usually worn out
physically
emotionally
and spiritually
but
something that has surprised me
is that I seem to be
starting each day
in a much better
frame of mind.

For this I am
both relieved and grateful.

Around me I am seeing

many friends
who are unhappy.

Throughout my most recent bout
of soul-deep unhappiness
the only constant source
of tolerability in this existence
has been a reflection on the natural world
and my belief in
the beauty and benefit
of the turning of the wheel of the year.

This is just something that I understand
something that I accept
even when I am in the midst
of rejecting all else
every aspect
of myself
of other people
the turning of the wheel
retained it's resonance
with my soul.

As each day passes
and I am feeling "better"
my love of the wheel of the year
has deepened
and broadened
and I have accepted
more and more
of what it includes.

For this I am also
both relieved and grateful.

But when I am seeing
my friends
unhappy about
what I am now seeing
to be intrinsically linked
to the turning of the wheel
it saddens my heart
that they are not seeing
the beauty
that is there
or that they are seeing the beauty
but are allowing their vision
to be tainted
and manifest itself
in negative comments
and compaints.

It makes me sad
because they are missing out
on an opportunity
for happiness
but also
they are taking a negative view
on the only thing
that got me through
the absolutely darkest period of my life.

Each day we are given
opportunities to learn and grow
and I am relieved and grateful
that I am again moving
in a positive direction
and am accepting
that I am still
and perhaps always will
be walking over rough, uneven ground
as I travel my path.

My focus at this time
is to work on mindfulness
of living in the moment
and of appreciating everything.

My prayer at this time
is that you will, too.

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