Thursday, October 14, 2010

Company

Today is
bright and shiny
for me
and for that
I am so very, very grateful.

There are
of course
things going wrong
in my life
in the lives of my friends
and in the world in general
such as there is everyday
but today
I seem somehow better equipped
to live amongst these things.

What has made today different?

Or, more accurately,
what has made today the same
but me different?

To be honest
I just don't know.

Does it matter what is different?

Well, in a way, it really does,
because without knowing what is different
I won't know what I need to change
next time I am feeling down.

There are certainly
tricks
I can use
to try to ward off
the darkness
but do any of these really work?

Clearly I'm not of the kind of disposition
to just stop questioning and accept
so in the absence of answers
I will continue with all of my many questions
to keep me company.

2 comments:

Rob-bear said...

I don't think I would ever encourage you to stop asking questions. Questions, your questions, are too important.

But, when you get a gift, sometimes the best thing to do is to say, "Thank you." And maybe even leave it at that for a while.

Wendy said...

well, i'm happy to say thank you, especially after such a prolonged absence of such days, but i'm glad that my questioning nature is returning, rather than the zombie-like state that had become my existence. this feels like the real me is coming back to the surface, even if that means it's still a crazy and tormented, at least it's becoming real and authentic.

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